*Note: I read this article recently and was very moved. I think that other quivering daughters and those who love them will be able to relate in many ways; if so, please leave your thoughts.
Everyone knows (at least here in America, the political brainwashing of the Cold War Era has told us that) that Communism doesn’t work. There are various economic and political reasons . . . but the most pressing one is individuality.
Individuality: the particular character, or aggregate of qualities, that distinguishes one person or thing from others; sole and personal nature
I keep remembering (for some reason, I am not sure of yet) a conversation I had with a soldier who was back in the US last fall. He had been stationed over various parts of Europe. We talked about Americanism, about culture differences, and about how the multi-cultural experiances had shaped or changed him.
(Note: He was not a very “good” person, and I met him at a fun party that some homeschooling friends and their family were having. He tried to flirt with me, and stuck very close in the pool (yeah…that was interesting), but when I was more interested in talking he got the picture and seemed to enjoy the a-typical person I was. (He hummed the “Jaws” theme song along with trying to “shark-bite” his hands in the water. I have not seen Jaws, so it turned out rather amusing).
Anyway, when he expressed delight in explaining to me his many tattoos (oh, yeah….did I mention that? Lets just say my dad wasn’t there to protect me), I asked him why he had so many and he replied: “It’s our individuality”. Even though (in uniform) none of them can be seen, he said that all of his buddies had them.
The military is a prime example of communism in the leveling that it tries to accomplish out of a mass of people. (Note: I am not attacking the military as an institution, or trying to say that they are Communist, just an example)
In my experience with Patriarchy, one of the biggest internally fatal problems is it’s refusal to allow for individualism. One example is the “community ownership” ~ or worse “Patriarch ownership”.
In our house everything (with a few exceptions of some things bought with personal money) is my Father’s. Even some of the things bought with our own money are, for a variety of reasons, also his. They were brought into HIS house. The other children would like to play with it also. We should share, etc, etc,etc.
If you want to HAVE something, you must hide it.
And we become expert hiders. Hide the urge to laugh at a “serious” time. Hide sinful emotions. Hide thoughts. Hide my diary. Hide my tears. Hide my heart.
If he doesn’t know, he can’t punish it…or worse…give you a talking to about it.
In a communistic family, children learn (some slower than others) that anything that matters to them cannot be seen outside of their uniform. However, inside they hide anything and everything that makes them who they are.
Slowly, the outward conformity tells the partent that they have a “good” child. The parents then think that what they see is all there is. They make no efforts to “get to know” the child that is (to them) perfectly accepting and (swallowing) all their teachings. If you thought them everything they know, you would know them better than they know themselves (something my mother tells me all too often).
Thus the bomb shell when this (perfect) child suddenly rebels, or does something completely sinful, or suddenly leaves home.
Driven into ourselves, we stew in our pain and our guilt. Often unable to discern the truth from the guilt motivation and the Biblical language, we either have to throw it all out or accept it and further condemn ourselves.
Why should I care about something that is not mine? That cannot ever be mine? Why bother?
Why does it matter?
Why does anything matter?
Why do I matter?
~ written by Daughter of a Heavenly Father