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From Reviews

“When rules and standards are exalted above God, it’s not surprising that law is emphasized over grace. This leads, McFarland tells us, to children who feel that they have to keep working for love even though they believe they’ll never be good enough for it. Quotes from the various daughters of patriarchy who talked to McFarland drive this point home—quotes like “I was never patient or perfect enough.” “The guilt would just increase.” “There is so much pressure to conform.” “I thought I might be okay—not good, but okay—enough for God because I was still wearing my long skirts every day.”
Ironically, McFarland writes, “While Quiverfull teaching exalts children as supreme blessings, it doesn’t reveal its grim underside—the silent reality that takes place in hundreds of homes every day and of which I learned: I am only a blessing when I’m useful, helpful, obedient, cheerful, kind, unselfish, submissive, compliant, and responsible.” Later, she adds, “We [children of patriarchy] see cognitive dissonance as ‘blessings’ essentially become ‘property’ to be manipulated and controlled.”
What’s even more disheartening is what happens to many of these children who grow up, break free, and share their stories. There seems to be a lack of understanding within the larger Christian community as to the actual nature of patriarchy. Sometimes the patriarchal lifestyle is even romanticized, as people marvel over how well-behaved the children seem and how adorable the girls look in their long dresses. All too often, Quivering Daughters warns, we fail to see the “fear-based living” and endless struggle for perfection behind the scenes.” From Christianity Today

“In her new book, Quivering Daughters: Hope and Healing for the Daughters of Patriarchy, Hillary McFarland explores a particularly troubling area of abuse and its possible effects upon a generation of Christian young women and their families — the potential pitfalls of a patriocentric family culture and how girls can be damaged by a system purportedly designed for their protection. With undisguised humility, McFarland points out that in such cases, the fear of pain and heartache and even sin can become a catalyst for beliefs and practices not necessarily in line with the teachings of our Lord or His patterns of dealing with His children. What results is a misplaced faith in programs or principles that assure protection to those who follow their formulas. All very good on paper, but when it comes to the complexities and unexplored countries of the individual human soul, it can be a recipe for disaster. And it’s a disaster all the more insidious for the characteristic habit it has of lurking under the pretty, smiling facade of mild-mannered conservative Christianity.” Lanier, YLCF

“For every woman who has suffered because of the Patriarchy and Quiverfull movement, you need this book. It’s beautifully written, and full of hope and redemption. And for the Quiverfull parents brave enough, courageous enough to consider a new way, you need this book too. For yourselves, and your daughters.” ~ Jeanette

“I just want to say how much I appreciate Hillary’s courage in sharing her journey in this book and her desire to help others process the wounds of their spiritually abusive pasts. The book was very thought provoking and I literally could not put it down.” ~ Shari L. Howerton


“This isn’t a book of theology and isn’t intended to be, although an ample amount of scripture is presented in the book and frequently used as a measuring stick. This is a book of real-time heart happening at the speed of life within the patriarchal movement.” ~ Lewis Wells

“The book is also amazing because even though it is intended for a very limited audience, it actually affected me in a profound way. Being neither a woman nor someone who grew up in the patriarchy movement, I still learned a great deal from it. In fact, I strongly recommend it to all fathers who have daughters. ~ Dr. Jay Wile

“…Here is an example where experience must inform our hermeneutics. We must see Christianity beyond theological statements and positions; it must penetrate into the center of our relationships.” ~ Rachel D. Ramer

“In this first-of-its-kind book, Hillary McFarland takes on the Patriarchal establishment in the biblical manner of Esther – with meekness and truth.” ~ Barbara Curtis

“Quivering Daughters is a must read for anyone, male and female alike, who has ever been involved in an authoritarian home or church. Ms. McFarland does an excellent job of proving to the world, by testimony of others as well as herself, the great harm done to children under neo-patriarchalism.”  ~ Sharon Sandlin

“Hillary makes it evident right from the start that she loved being homeschooled, loved having a house full of siblings, and that she deeply loves her mother and father. This is no “Mommy Dearest” treatise nor is it a forum for rebellious homeschooling daughters. Instead, Hillary graciously explains the nature and practice of spiritual abuse while weaving together both her own experiences and those of young women who have suffered at the hands of a patriocentric system into a book that is certain to touch many hearts. To be clear, this is no psycho babbling self-help book either. Instead, Hillary encourages her readers to seek the grace so fully offered by Jesus Christ to heal and sustain them and to embrace forgiveness as they rebuild their lives. Giving credit to her parents for instilling a love of Scripture in her life, Quivering Daughters capably explains the wrong doctrines of patriocentricity, rightly correcting its attitudes and teachings with what the Bible actually says.” ~ Karen Campbell

“Every time I re-read another section of the book, I am changed and healed more deeply.”  ~ Cindy Kunsman

“I won’t plug every new book that comes along, but this is one that I wept over.” ~ Meg Moseley

“The only disappointed I had was that there were too much scripture in the book.” ~ Tery at Book Review Cafe

“…deeply moving and emotional…” ~ Hopewell

“Hillary’s book is a behind the scenes look at what takes place in the hearts of many quivering daughters from around the world. In my experience, as a spiritual counselor and former cult member, I testify that this kind of abuse is not isolated to the quiverfull movement.” ~ Sister Lisa 
 

Other Amazon Reviews